About that holy bible

It’s in swedish so someone will have to copy the text and run it through Google translate or something if they want to read this. I just don’t have the time right now.

The text is funny and it is true.

But hey, maybe Dee has the time to translate this for you?

That was awesome.

i still cant read it =/

i was hoping i would randomly acquire the ability to read it, oh well

I could translate it for you in the near future if you want.

That would be lovely Liks.

Yes, I would love to read what it says, especially coming from my background.

You going to get that translated anytime soon Liks?

I wish I could read Swedish. :frowning:

On the topic of Sweden: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3d-qENAaNbM

I had to post that. :slight_smile:

I’m glad you liked that channel! It’s one of my favorites.

Pre-dinner mayonnaise ftw!!

Wrote the text in swedish and ran it through Google Translate.

Open letter to Yngve Kalin, and all the priests who signed the rebellion against
blessing of same-sex couples.

Hello. I listen to your wise words, but still have some issues that I think you can help me with.

I was going to sell my daughter into slavery (second Exodus 21:7).
What would you consider a fair price?

The 3rd Exodus 24:44 it says clearly that I may possess both male and female slaves from
a neighboring country. a friend of mine claims that it only applies to limestone outside the EU who of us is right?

Another friend of mine works at Hemk?p and insists that work on Sundays. I am fully
aware that he must be slain (2nd Gen. 35’s), but I am morally responsible for doing
this myself?

Every time I burn a bull as sacrifice, I know that this gives an aroma pleasing to the Lord
(3rd Genesis 1:9). The problem is that the neighbors complain, so you may as well be a barbecue
great steak?

One of my friends say that even if it is an abomination to eat shellfish
(3rd Exodus 18:22), so is homosexuality worse (3rd Exodus 18:22). Who among us has the right, or
it is just as bad?

I’m nearsighted, so I go goes without saying not to church so I do not get to approach the altar of God, when I
looks bad (3rd Exodus 21:20). Now I am invited to a wedding, and I wonder if it’s ok if I
stands in the porch.

Many of my friends go to the barber and cut hair on the sides and shave his beard at the edges.
That is a sin according to third Deuteronomy 19:27. How should they be punished?

My children have started to train in Malm? FF, but in 3rd Genesis 11:7-8 says that we should not touch
some remnants of a dead pig, so I wonder if I should require of Malmo FF to use plastic ball?

My children said desstuom to me once last week, and I wonder if I really need
stone them to death at the city gate, (5th Exodus 21:18-21), or if I might as well do it
in your garden?

My uncle has a farm in Bj?rred and he insists on growing both potatoes and wheat and
sin of course when the third Genesis 19:19.

His wife is not much better because she is dressed in clothes made of more than one
fabric material (usually a blend of cotton and polyester). He also has the nasty habit of
swear a lot. Is it really absolutely necessary that we collect ALL Bj?rred to stone them
(3rd Exodus 24:10-16)?
Or is it better to burn them to death in a familjeb?l as we usually do with people
sleeping in the same bed as their relatives (third Exodus 20:14)?

I know you have gone in depth on these issues, and I look forward to your reply. A large
thank you upstanding priests to show that the Bible is unchanging!


I can clean up the text tomorrow.

I tried looking up the references on biblegateway.com but they seem to be the wrong references. Maybe the Swedish bible has a different verse index than the English ones?

Very funny read. Its amazing some people still try to interpret the bible that way.


Oh… I figured it out. In Swedish, the Pentateuch (Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy) are named 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5 Mosebok respectively. It seems like google translator screwed up the corresponding Swedish numbered system to the English names.