I went on vacation.

This is copy-pasta’d from the Facebook note I wrote. There’s a TL;DR at the bottom.

So I just got back from vacation in St. Croix, and I got a chance to use a computer again, so I decided to write about everything that happened there.


I stayed up until our flight at 4 that morning. There were actually a lot of people there for 4 in the morning, but going through security was faster than usual. Our first plane landed in Atlanta after about two hours, then I got a bagel to eat (which was pretty bad), and our next plane left almost immediately after. This one took about three hours. The airport in St. Croix was a lot smaller and less organized than the other two, but that just let us leave faster. We took a taxi, which was actually a van, to The Buccaneer on the other side of the island and did all the checking in and unpacking, then finally went to our rooms. There were two bedrooms and a very nice couch in our living room, which I got to sleep on. For the rest of the day we walked around the resort and familiarized ourselves with it, then went to The Terrace, a terrace in the main building and a restaurant called The Terrace, and had mediocre food. And then I slept for the first time in a while.


I?m actually having some trouble remembering what we did Sunday. I know that we went up to The Terrace to have complementary breakfast, and I noticed an attractive girl about my age, and we exchanged awkward non-looks (you know, trying not to let the other notice you?re looking at them and trying to avoid walking near them). Then I think we went to the pool and beach by our room for a while, and maybe over to the other beach. Whatever happened, I know it wasn?t important.


The same thing happened this morning as the last, we went to breakfast, I saw that person, and we went back to the room. But this morning, we got a ride over to the golf courses. We started out with ten balls. It turns out that since the last time I played golf, I developed a 45? right slice, so on every single shot I would line up my feet with the ball and pin, then place the club on the ground rotated 45? counter-clockwise from the direction my feet were pointed. And this actually worked pretty well. After the first few holes I started getting some good shots off the tee, and we all hit in the water or the trees a few times, and then we got to the 9th hole (the last for us). It was a short par three, but everything between the tee and the hole was water. We each had one ball left. My parents went first. The first one went straight down into the water, and the second one went to the right into the trees. Somehow, I rotated my shot the right amount and hit it right way to have it drop right on the green. Of course, it was pretty far away from the hole, but I still got it in two more shots. I kept the ball as a souvenir, and it turned out it has the hotel logo on it. We went back to the farther beach (really not that far, maybe a 2-3 minute walk, but it was farther than the one by our room) and had lunch at the little restaurant there, went in the ocean for a while, sat for a while, went to the pool for a while, sat for another while, and got ready for dinner. We went to The Terrace again and I saw that girl again, our food was still mediocre, but this time we order a plate of three fruit (mango, papaya, blackberry) sorbets. And they were really, really good. Then we went back to the room, I watched TV, and then slept.


This morning we got up early because were taking a boat over to a small, uninhabited island where there bluer water, coral reefs, etc. and they didn?t know if the wind would be too bad to dock at the resort, so we could?ve had to go into town to get to it. The wind wasn?t too bad, so we had gotten up early for nothing, and had to wait for an hour and a half for the boat to come. It finally did and we were told to take our shoes off, and then got on. My parents found some open seats (although you can?t really call them seats, there were just six plastic rectangular columns going down the boat), and I think to my surprise, they happened to be directly across from where that girl and her family were sitting. Palms hit their respective faces everywhere. After going over all the rules the crew of the boat let people ride in the front of the boat, and she instantly got up and did so. Anyway, it turns out I don?t get seasick, and the boat ride took about twenty minutes. They handed out snorkeling equipment and let everyone out of the boat. Because we had snorkeled before, we didn?t need to wait there and be taught by the crew. My parents? favorite spot on the beach happened to be uncomfortably close to where that girl and her family were. But after half an hour or so (and because there was really nothing special on this side of he island), we went back to the boat, and after everyone was on, it left for the other side. Here, they handed out life jackets because there was no ground to stand on and the waves were very rough. They paired about eight people with a crew member who took them on about a ten minute tour, and the entire time there was a fat Danish lady in a tight swimsuit swimming right in front of me. My flippers were also cutting right behind be big toenails, which are still trying to heal a week later. After the tour, I went back to the boat, got new flippers, and took a camera that we had bought at the resort out. I got some decent pictures of coral and fish and squid-things, and I later found out I stopped right when the camera had run out of film, but didn?t know it at the time. We waited for a while in the boat for everyone to come back, and then it left. That girl and her little brother rode in front again, and her parents actually got mine to take their picture while we were in front of the island. The ride back was much smoother because we were going with the waves, and it took about fifteen minutes. When we got back, we had lunch, went to the beach, sat, went to the pool, sat, and got ready for dinner. That night, we took a taxi (which a driver named Bachelor) to a restaurant called Cheeseburger in Paradise. It was owned and run by Americans, which made it SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better than anything we had had so far. Then we went back to the room.


Just like the other three mornings, we went up to have breakfast and I saw that girl again. We went golfing again this morning, but this time on the back nine. I did pretty badly. Then we went to the beach, sat, pool, sat, dinner.


This was the day we were leaving, and again, we got breakfast and I saw that girl again (Little did I know, this was he last time I would see her. Good job me, can?t even talk to someone). We just packed and got lunch, then went to the airport, waited about an hour and got on the plane. This time we had to wait three hours in Atlanta, and we got home at about midnight.


This morning we got our dogs back from the kennel, and I was suffering from Post Vacation Depression. That?s pretty much it.

TL;DR: Went to island, did island things, didn?t talk to girl, went home.

If someone’s returning non-looks and there’s a chance you’ll see them daily for 3-5 days, my advice from experience is to just get it over with and talk to them. Worst case scenario, it turns out they’re not interested and you can get on with your vacation without the awkward distractions.
Or you could wait for the perfect opportunity to talk to them, like the boat ride or anywhere that’s not the dining room thing, which may never come and, even if it does, may find you still too nervous to talk to her. Like it did.

But hey, not as bad as me. During MY vacation, a fairly hot girl came up and started dancing in front of me, shaking her ass at me, turning her head around and looking at me with a grin, grinding up against me, etc, but because I was there with my nephew, I just kinda went “wtf” and stepped away.
(Plus there’s the fact that I’m a terribad dancer and anyone that finds me more interesting than Oka has a couple screws loose.)

what’s the point if you’re not gunna see her ever again after the 5th day… oh wait, vagina.

There’s that, too. That far from home, I don’t usually bother, but eh.
Connections are connections. And some people like to have connections with attractive females no matter how far away they are.

Except I’m a coward and a pussy and I can’t even make conversation with strangers of the same gender.

Yeah. I’m not that different. But unless you get “for real” panic attacks and whatnot from it, there’s a certain degree of “just do it” involved.
Things started to get awesome when I realized I could still move my body to do things I wanted to do but wasn’t exactly comfortable with. Things like concerts got more awesome, whether I was on stage or in the crowd.
Also talking to girls 'n stuff.
It helps to be able to continue conversation when a girl talks to you/asks you a question, rather than just answering awkwardly and moving on.

“DO IT FAGGOT” is like “just do it” but with less corporate sponsorship

just sayin’, keep your big business out of my vernacular

and yeah i can’t talk to girls I don’t know I have no idea how to start
talking to dudes I don’t know though? easy